Complete Calm

I went to the beach today, and went out too far.
The rip tide sucked me out, and the waves were breaking past me.
I wasn't scared.
I swam towards shore and was caught by the life guard, telling me only to go waist deep next time.
I'd do it again.
I felt at home, and I felt no danger.

I haven't felt really, honestly at home in a while.

And It Seems to Just Come Back

Every time I think I'm fine.

So you turn the radio up louder so you can't hear it.

You drive a little faster so the wind blows it away.

You run from it so you don't have to deal with it.

You don't open the envelope so you can say you didn't see it.

You delete it so it doesn't look like you said it.

You justify actions so you don't have to take the responsibility for them.

But it's still there. It's all still sitting there, waiting for you to quit taking the backseat and to take the dive into what you need to.

So Relevant

She said I think I'll go to Boston...
I think I'll start a new life,
I think I'll start it over, where no one knows my name,
I'll get out of California, I'm tired of the weather,
I think I'll get a lover and fly em out to Spain...
I think I'll go to Boston,
I think that I'm just tired
I think I need a new town, to leave this all behind...
I think I need a sunrise, I'm tired of the sunset,
I hear it's nice in the Summer, some snow would be nice...

--Boston, by Augustana

Not much more to say. I'm just tired. Wake me up please. But wake me up when summer starts. Not now.

Keep Pushing Me Down

'Cause I need it.

I need to be able to get up by myself.

1973

Polaroid SX-70

Circle in Orange, here I come for $56 dollars of antique amazingness.

Miles and Miles

I am, quite literally, running myself into the ground.