Writing My Way Out

Mammoth cross country camp starts tomorrow to my excitement! I'm so ready to get out of this town. It's going to be a week of "rebooting" to say the least. I need a total break from some things at home, cough, Mom, cough. It's the same thing with her all the damn time. It sucks though. She asked me if I was feeling depressed lately today. I guess I give off some sucky vibes. 

I haven't had much to write in the past few days. I'm coming back to who I am though, almost. It's almost like I'm scared to even think about it though; I'm scared of having a "relapse" per say. It's all life though, the ebbing and flowing without conscious realizations of who or what it's effecting. But really, if such things didn't happen, life would be pretty deadbeat; too predictable, like living the same day, everyday. I try to stay as optimistic as I can through it all though; I figure there's got to be a good side to most everything. 

On another note, I've realized that words come easily to me through writing. I can't necessarily speak them without stumbling over a word or punctuation mark, but I can write like it's as natural as breathing. Thoughts and ideas come to me out of no where, and I just write them down, whether it be on a napkin, in my phone, or on paper. Creative lyrics a lot of the time, or whatever I'm writing on this blog. I'll throw in lyrics I come up with as I go from time to time. 

It's 11:11pm, make a wish! Haha. I need to finish packing and catch some ZZZZZs. I'll update when I have access to internet in about a week. 

"Fingers dance on the keyboard in cirlces, waiting for a ghost melody to appear by chance.."