I Thought It Could Last Forever

It has done exactly the opposite. We were so close. He was who knew me inside and out; who could tell me what I was thinking when I was lost. He was my best friend above and beyond all other things. It's weird using the word "was", because I've always used "is". It just doesn't feel like it "is" anymore. We don't talk, I don't know what's going on in his life anymore, nor does he know what's going on in mine. I guess it's what happens though. Things you love fall apart; distance themselves in time, right in front of your face. I take it as a lesson. A lesson to show that some things that seem great at times, aren't always that way. To show that you have to contribute more than you think you're capable of to keep things alive. To show that some people distance themselves for good reasons, even though at the time it might seem ridiculous and horrible. I'm taking this. Letting myself bleed, and letting someone into my life for the sake of renewal. I'd love to have what we had back, but I'm just doubting that it will ever happen. Too much has happened between what it used to be, and what it is now, that I don't know how to make that transition, or even if I honestly could. So for now, I'm just part of what used to be, and so is he. I can't wrap my mind around it yet, but I'll eventually accept it. 

In other news. I'm feeling lost again. Discontent. Quiet.